Dore ibyiciro by’abakobwa ukwiye kugendera kure, ibibi byabo n’ibyiza byabo niba ushaka kubaka urugo

Iyo ugiye kubaka urugo uba wifuza uwo muzabana mugahuza, mukungura umuryango, mwabona urubyaro cyangwa mwarubura mugahorana ubufatanye busumba ubusanzwe. Muri iyi nkuru tugiye kubagezaho murasangamo amoko y’abakobwa wakwisunga mu kubaka urugo cyangwa se abo wagendera kure kugirango wubake urugo rwiza

 Burya abakobwa babamo ibyiciro, ndetse hari ibyiza n’ibibi bya buri cyiciro. Ni ngombwa ko umenya ndetse ugasobanukirwa n’icyiciro urimo, niba uri umukobwa n’imiterere yacyo. Umuhungu nawe agomba kumenya ibi byiciro kugira ngo amenye uko azajya yitwara kumukobwa bakundana.

1.Umunyabirori

Umukobwa w’umunyabirori ni ukunda iteka gusohoka. Ikiranga aba bakobwa ni uko baba bakunda kubaho ubuzima bwiza, kandi bwiganjemo gusohokana n’inshuti zabo cyangwa iteka akaba yumva atacikwa n’ibirori. Ibi biherekeza no gukunda kunywa ahanini ibisindisha nibiyobyabwenge ndetse no gukunda gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina.

Uyu muco wo gukunda kuryamana n’abagabo aba yarawandujwe n’abantu benshi b’ingeri zose bagiye bahurira muri ibyo birori. Ntakangwa no gukesha amajoro ari mu birori

Inama: Niba ubona ushaka cyangwa ukundana n’umukobwa uteye gutya ,ugomba kumenya uko umwitwaraho.

Uramutse udakunda gusohoka no kwitabira ibirori nkawe ntimwashobokana. Ikindi ni uko amahirwe yo kuguca inyuma aba ari menshi kuko usanga ahanini aba bakobwa baba batagira rutangira mu gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina.

Ugomba kuba wifite umufuka uremereye kuko nutamusohokana ntibizamubuza kwijyana cyangwa gusohokana n’abifite.

2.Umwibone

 Umukobwa w’umwibone arangwa no kwiyitaho byo mu rwego rwo hejuru. Aba yumva wakoresha amafaranga menshi , imbaraga nyinshi kugira ngo ukunde utuma yishima. Uyu mukobwa twise umwibone yita cyane kukuntu agaragara.

Niwamukobwa ukunda ibirungo(Maquillage)bihenze bimugira mwiza kurushaho, gukoresha inzara cyangwa imisatsi nibura buri cyumweru mu gihe abandi hashobora gushira n’ukwezi, abiri cyangwa atatu batarasubira muri salon kwitunganya. Imyenda yambara , ibikomo n’indi mitako byose aba ashakako biba ari iby’agaciro kandi bidafitwe na buri wese.

Inama: Gukundana n’umukobwa uteye utya bisaba kuba wihagazeho mu mufuka. Akunda gusohokera mu ma resitora ahenze, hoteli z’icyitegererezo, salon z’abagore zihagazeho. Niba ushaka gukundana n’umukobwa uteye gutya ugomba kwitegura gukorana imbaraga zawe zose agahora yishimye kandi icyo ashaka cyose akakibona, bitabaye ibyo muzabyarana abo. Gutunga imodoka byo ni ahame ahubwo igomba kuba nayo ari yayindi irangaza abahisi n’abagenzi.

Uyu mukobwa ashobora kuguha ishema haba mu babyeyi bawe ,inshuti, abavandiwe, abo mukorana kubera ukuntu aba agaragara neza. Ariko tekereza kabiri mbere yo kumukunda cyangwa gukomeza gukundana nawe. Ese uzabasha kumubonera ibyo akenera byose iteka?Ese nimubana nukena urabona azihanganira kudasa neza mukagumana?Umenye uko ateye , amahitamo ni ayawe.

3.Umunyamasengesho

Gusenga ni byiza ntawe tutabyemeranyaho , n’abatabikunda si uko bayobewe ko baremwe n’Imana rurema byose , babeshejweho nayo, ..kandi baba bagomba kuyambaza no kuyisingiza. Ikizakubwira umukobwa w’umunyamasengesho:Kwitabira gahunda zose z’idini, gukurikira cyane mu gihe cy’inyigisho,akunda kuba ari umwe mu bigisha abana cyangwa izindi nyigisho zo mu idini ryabo,kuguhatira no kugushishikariza ko mwajyana gusenga.

Uyu mukobwa usanga ahagaze ashikamye ku myemerere ye,utapfa kumuhindura uko wiboneye. Aba bakobwa baba batandukanye n’abandi. Bakunda kumara igihe kinini bari kumwe n’imiryango yabo, abavandimwe. Ntibanywa ibisindisha cyangwa ibindi biyobyabwenge. Barambara bakikwiza kandi bariyubaha.

Inama:  Abakobwa b’abanyamasengesho ni abakobwa nk’abandi nabo barakunda /bagakundwa. Gusa kumutereta bisaba kubyitondera.

Icyibanze ni ukuba mu isi imwe nawe. Ugomba kuba nawe ukunda kandi witabira amasengesho. Igitekerezo cyo kuryamana nawe ushatse wacyikuramo kuko bizakugora. Aha ndavuga abakobwa b’abanyamasengesho nyakuri kuko hari abo nabonye basigaye bihisha mu madini kandi mu mutima ari ibirura.

Kumusohokana bizakugora, kumujyana ahandi hatari mu biterane by’amasengesho bizagusaba izindi tekiniki. Gukundana n’umukobwa w’umunyamsengesho bikurinda irari no gupfusha ubusa umutungo kuko we ntahora agusaba amafaranga yo kwiyitaho nibindi biranga ubundi bwoko bw’abakobwa twabonye

4.Umuhubutsi

Ikiranga icyiciro cy’abakobwa b’abahubutsi ni uko bakora ikintu batatekereje ingaruka,bagira amahane,ntatinya kwangiza ibintu by’agaciro iyo agize umujinya,ntakangwa no gutongana n’umuntu/abantu/umukunzi we mu bantu benshi…Mwene aba bakobwa iyo mutandukanye, ukabona undi mukunzi,uzamubwirwa n’uko azamutera ubwoba cyangwa se mwembi akabakanga kakahava.

Ibintu byose akora biba birimo ubuhubutsi n’ubusazi. Umukobwa w’umuhubutsi kandi akunda kubahwa ,ibintu iyo bigenze uko adashaka akora amarorerwa.

Inama: Niba umenye ko ateye gutya inama isumba izindi ni ukumucika mu bwenge. Ntakintu wakora ngo umuhindure.

Biri mu maraso ye. Ahanini ntiwapfa guhita ubimubonaho. Bisaba amezi nka 2 mumenyanye ngo ubone iyi ngeso mbi. Niba wiyemeje gukundana n’umukobwa uteye gutya banza utekereze kabiri ,ejo utazicuza impamvu wamukunze. Ubu bwoko bw’abakobwa no mugihe muryamanye(gutera akabariro) aba ashaka kukuyobora uko ubimukorera.

Niba wumva utahara ubwiza bwe, dore ko ahanini mwene aba bakobwa baba basa na bike, witegure intambara n’intonganya zidashira mu rugo rwanyu,kugutegeka,.. Indi nama nagiriwe n’umuntu ariko ntarakoraho ubushakashatsi kukunrtu wakwitwara kuri ubu bwoko bw’abakobwa ni ukudaha agaciro ibikorwa n’amagambo ye mabi, ukamwereka ko ntacyo bikubwiye kandi ntunamugirire umujinya.

Ngo azabona ko ibyo akora ntaho byamugeza agende abicikaho. Hitamo hagati y’izo nama zombie ayagushobokera kandi ikakugirira akamaro.

5.Ufuha

 Muri rusange abagore/abakobwa bose barafuha ariko kurugero rutandukanye nk’uko abagore/abakobwa batandukanye kandi badahuje imico.

Hari abafuha rero bikarenga urugero bikaba byakwangiza umubano afitanye n’umuhungu bakundana. Ashobora gufuha igihe akubonanye n’undi muntu w’igtsina gore, kumva ko ariwe mwahorana, cyangwa agafuhira buri kantu kose kuburyo uba wumva bikugeze ahantu. Afuhira inshuti zawe, agafuhira akazi kawe akumva ndetse utakamurutisha, umuryango ,ibyo ukunda n’ibindi .

Ubusanzwe bavuga ko umuntu afuhira uwo akunda ariko gufuha bikabije byangiza urukundo kuruta uko byaba byarugira rwiza. Abakobwa bafuha babiterwa ahanini n’abahungu bakundanye mu bihe byahise batari abizerwa cyangwa nawe mukundana ubu nturi shyashya.

Inama: Niba ubona gufuha aricyo kintu kibi afite gusa ahandi ari sawa, shyiramo imbaraga urebe ko wamuhindura. Mwereke ko uri umwizerwa kandi ugerageze kumwubakamo icyizere. Niba ubona bikabije kandi bikubangamiye, kuramo akawe karenge hakiri kare ejo utazicuza kuko gufuha nabyo biri mu bintu byakwica urukundo.

6.Muberarugo

 Ba muberarugo barangwa no kwita cyane ku rugo. Nubwo aba atarashaka umugabo ariko usanga yibanda ku isuku mu rugo iwabo, yita kubana ndetse anabakunda. Nubwo bateye guty ariko umusore wese kumutereta akamusaba ko baryamana biroroha.

Baba bafite umutima mwiza, ubuntu rimwe na rimwe butiza urugi. Kuba mwaryamana kuburyo bworoshye ahanini biterwa n’amashyushyu bagira yo kumva nabo babyara abana kuko nicyo kintu cyambere bakunda, kunguka urubyaro no kurwitaho.

Inama: Iki cyiciro cy’abakobwa niho wakura umugore uzubaka rugakomera. Bagira gahunda kandi bakemya inshingano zabo mu rugo kuko baba baranabitangiye bakiri iwabo . Niba uteganya gushaka umukobwa uteye gutya ugomba kuba ukunda abana kuko azagusaba ko mubyara benshi.

7.Umukobwa wigenga

Ugize Imana wahura n’umwe mu bakobwa bari muri iki cyiciro . Ni ubwoko bw’abakobwa badakunda kubaho ubuzima bushingiye ku bahungu/abagabo. Abaho yumva agomba kwigenga no kugendera kumahame ye. Kuba mukundana ntibivuga ko agomba kugutura ibibazo byose cyangwa ko ari wowe ugomba kubimukemurira.

Abahungu batinya abakobwa babarira amafaranga, bakunda ibintu kurusha bantu,aba siko bateye . Ntiyapfa kugusaba ko umukemurira ikibazo. Icyo agukeneyeho ni urukundo gusa.

Inama: Nuhura nuyu mukobwa uteye gutya ntuzazuyaze ndetse ufite uburyo wahita umushyira mu mago(Mukabana). Avamo umugore mwiza ushimwa na buri wese. Mwene aba bakobwa bagira umurongo bagenderaho kandi ntibakunda agakungu n’abakobwa/abagore.

8.Umukobwa udakinishwa

Ubu bwoko bw’abakobwa nabwo ni bwiza. Ntibakunda abagabo baza bashaka kubagira ibikoresho byabo bishimishirizaho cyangwa bajyana aho bashaka . Ntago bakunda ibintu bisa n’imikino umuhungu/umugabo yabazanaho. Uyu mukobwa we ubwe ashobora kuguhamgara akakubwira ko ashaka ko musohokana.

Baba bazi icyo kuvuga no gukora ntaguca kuruhande cyangwa kurya indimi. Ntibakunda ikintu cyabagayisha mubandi,barabyirinda.

Inama:  Niba ukundana ni umukobwa uteye gutya ugomba kwirinda uburyarya,ntibabikunda.

Ugomba kumenya guhagarara ku ijambo uvuze nabo niko bateye kandi niwe muhungu/mugabo baba bifuza. Uyu mukobwa nawe umubonye ntiwazuyaza kuko yakubaka urugo rugakomera.

Nabo ntibakunda agakungu cyangwa kujya mubintu bitabafitiye agaciro. Bakora ikiri ngombwa mugihe kandi mugihe. Ikindi cyagufasha igihe mwaba mukundana ni uko ntaburyarya uzamutegerezaho ,uko akubona cyangwa akwiyumvamo arabikugaragariza adaciye kuruhande nawe ukamenya icyo ugomba gukora n’aho uahagaze.

9.Umukobwa w’umutima/w’umwizerwa

Nubwo abantu bakunze kubijyaho impaka ko batakibaho, abakobwa b’umutima barahari n’ubwo babarika. Ikiranga umukobwa w’umutima n’uko adashobora kuguca inyuma uko byagenda kose. Niba mukundana ntabwo yirirwa akebaguza areba abandi bakuruta cyangwa yakurutisha. Niba musohokanye, akugumishaho umutima n’ibitekerezo ,ntabwo agurukana n’ibiguruka. Niyo ibihe byahinduka bibi akunambaho.

Inama: Abakobwa b’umutima bubaka ingo zikaramba ndetse mugasazana. Ugomba kwirinda kumuca inyuma nkuko nawe atabitekereza.

 10.Umukinnyi

 Umukobwa uteye gutya aba yujuje ibisabwa byose kugira ngo umukobwa abe mwiza ku mubiri(kubigaragara inyuma).Aba ari mwiza, ashitura, avuga neza mbese byose aba abyujuje.

Akoresha ubu bwiza ngo akurure abasore/abagabo. Akunda kuba afite inshuti nyinshi cyane z’abasore/abagabo. Aba abizi ko abantu babona ubwiza bwe kandi babimukundira,akabigenderaho agakina n’imitima yabo cyane abagabo kakahava.

Ubu bwoko bw’abakobwa ntibuhazwa no gukundana n’umuntu umwe.

Inama: Nubwo uyu mukobwa ashobora kuguhesha ishema mu bandi ariko ntutinda kubona ko utahira iryo shema. Aza kukureba kuko hari icyo agukeneyeho, ubundi agasa n’ukwibagiwe. Uzumva abantu babikubwira ko akundana n’abantu benshi cyangwa nawe uzabyibonera.

Iyo umaze kumenya imico ye utangira gucanganyukirwa. Uyu mukobwa rero ni uwo kwitonderwa. Ni uwo gusohokana si uwo kubaka. Wikwibwira ko wazamuhindura niko ateye. Shaka ufite urukundo kuruta uko washidukira ubwiza ukazicuza.

11.Umunyabwenge.

 Iki ni icyiciro cy’abakobwa baba ari abanyabwenge. Ikintu cyose aba agifiteho ibitekerezo. Ashobora kukugira inama nziza kandi zubaka. Umwanya wabo munini bawumara basoma ibitabo,bari kuri internet biyungura ubumenyi kubintu batazi, Ntibanga kwambara neza ariko ntibabiha n’umwanya.

Kuribo amasomo n’ubumenyi biza mbere ibindi bikaza nyuma. Bakunda kugira inzozi nyinshi,iyo batsinzwe nko mu ishuri bumva isi ibarangiriyeho.

Nubwo uba ubona batitaye ku rukundo cyane nk’abandi bakobwa ariko nabo barakunda/bagakundwa.

Inama: Niba ushaka gutereta umunyabitabo,ugomba kuba uzi kuryoshya ikiganiro kuburyo umushimisha ,ukamusetsa..bizoroha kumwegukana. Si ngombwa ko nawe uba uzi ubwenge bwinshi. Kumenya gutereta utavuga ubusa ahubwo uvuga ingingo zifatika .

Numwereka ababyeyi bazamwishimira kuko aba afite imico y’umukobwa warezwe anitwara neza. Nimukundana azajya akugira inama bigufashe mu iterambere ryawe. Yavamo umufasha mwiza ariko ntago aba bakobwa bakunda umugabo watwawe n’imikino,muzajya mubipfa kuko nabo ntibabikunda. Ntagira agakungu n’abandi bakobwa cyangwa abagabo

12.The Motherly

Uyu nawe ajya kumera nka muberarugo. Akunda abana kandi akagira ibitekerezo biruta imyaka ye kure. Atekereza ahazaza akanamenya gupangira ubuzima bwe buzaza. Ntabwo ahubuka niyo wamugaya abigendamo gahoro.

Arangwa no gutega amatwi inshuti ze iyo zimugisha inama kandi akamenya gutanga inama nziza mu gihe gikenewe. Ntibita kubyo rubanda batekereza ahubwo bakunda gukora ibintu kuburyo bwabo.

Inama: Uyu nawe yakuviramo inshuti nziza ndetse n’umufasha mwiza wazakurerera abana bawe. Niba ukoze amakosa arabikubwira kandi akakugira n’inama y’icyo wakora ngo ugaruke mu nzira.Ushakanye n’umukobwa umeze gutya, ababyeyi bawe byabashimisha cyane. Ibintu bye abikora kumurongo.

13.Mutemberezi

Arangwa no gukunda ibyo abahungu/abagabo bakunda. Akunda kandi agashimishwa no gutembera cyane ahantu hashya. Ntiyita ku myambarire cyane. Akunda kugira inshuti nyinshi z’abagabo kuruta iz’abagore. Mwene aba bakobwa bakunda kwisanga mu biganiro by’abahungu ndetse akabyibonamo.

Inama: Gukundana n’umukobwa uteye gutya biragora. Uzahorana umutima uhangayitse kuko we yikundira abahungu/abagabo kuruta uko yisanga kubakobwa/abagore. Ugomba kwitegura kuba mukerarugendo ariko sinzi ko wamushimisha ,aba yumva yajya ahantu henshi hashoboka. Icyangombwa ni uko umenye imiterere imyanzuro ni iyawe.

Kuba tubagezaho ibi byiciro ntibivuze ko umukobwa adashobora kwisanga afite imico yo mubindi byiciro ,mbese akaba yakwibona henshi.Intego ni ukwigisha abakobwa imico myiza babona kubindi byiciro. Abasore nabo bagomba kumenya guhitamo neza badashituwe n’ubwiza gusa.

Adeline Uwineza

Rwandatribune.com